‘Buri Nazar’ How to save yourself from it!

Buri Nazar is a pandemic that has been scaring mothers or people for time unknown. Once you have a baby it is said that you have to protect your baby from the evil eye or buri nazar in every little activity starting from birth like no one should see your child’s face, you should not click pictures of your baby, you should not show any one your child while feeding or don’t show their bottle of milk, don’t dry their clothes out in the open and the list is endless. It is often said that the evil eye or buri Nazar your baby attracts can have multiple bad results such as bad health and much worse things too.

I have been warned so many times for posting #babyM s pictures on Instagram I was told that I am attracting trouble by doing so. Honestly that was so scary but then I decided to understand this phenomenon better.

The legend has it that pregnant women and babies both attract a lot of negative energy from the universe while they also receive a lot of blessings at the same time.

I believe this universe consists of all sorts of energies. Like we have a lot of positive energy floating around through all the good things in this world, to balance that out there is also an equal amount of negative energy if not more out there too.

I believe this is how this earth or this world or this universe is able to create a balance.

So yes I do believe in buri Nazar or evil eye but I also don’t let it control my life.

It is good to be aware of such energies and it’s even better if you can protect yourself or your loved ones from it. But not choosing to live your life to the fullest of the fear of this negative energy is the biggest punishment you can give yourself.

So once I became a mother I was also equally afraid of this ‘buri Nazar’ myself I was constantly worried that something may happen to my baby. But soon I realised that if I continue to think like this I may not be able to fully enjoy this period. So I gathered as much information as I could from my father (who is an expert in the matter of energies) and other elders about the prevention of it rather than trying to stop living my life!!

Here are some ways to protect your baby from the evil eye / buri nazar that I believe work great, even with adults.

🧿 Kajal ka Tika – black kohl dot can be made behind the ear or under the foot, cover it with some talcum powder to cover it up.

🧿 Keep a piece of solid Hing tied in a small zip lock bag & then put it in cloth pouch in baby’s bag. You can even a tie it on your baby’s cot.

🧿 A Black thread tied around the waist, wrists, ankles does wonders.

🧿 Every week on a thursday mop your house with water that contains rock salt & alum / phitkari.

🧿 While putting your baby to sleep, pray to whichever God or form of energy you believe in and ask for protection for your baby and yourself and also ask for removal of any negative energy that your child you may have attracted through the day.

🧿 Light a lamp / Diya / incense sticks / agarbatti every evening around sunset to cleanse the energy of your house. It’s best to do it in the temple of your house.

🧿Have a clean heart, don’t think negative thoughts. When your heart and mind is full of negative feelings such as hate, resentment, guilt, jealousy and unhealthy comparisons. You become a hub of negativity and also attract more negative energy. It is important to keep your energies clean, think good things, appreciate more, forgive more, stop comparing your baby, yourself or your life with others, crib less, complain less, stay calm & stay happy.

In the end trust the process, believe in the good, nurture your surroundings. Become a source of positivity & all will be well.

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Why hiring a Mother is a good idea?

Having a baby still remains one of the most unexplainable joys of human life! We are in 2019 and we are full of so much information, apps, facilities and things that make our life easier as mothers yet there is still one matter that subconsciously bothers almost every mother – “the stigma of going back to work after a baby”. There is a slight sense of incompetence that creeps in when a mother starts to think of her career.

Women comprise of almost 48% of the workforce in India. Yet only 27% of new mothers come back to work after a baby. Sad but true, it’s not only the society, the social pressure, the guilt, the lack ok help and the work life balance that makes it difficult.

Organizations tend to form an opinion far sooner than expected, once they hear of a baby. When it comes to going back to the corporate world, some eyebrows are still raised about how productive will this woman be after being a mother. Now that my daughter is 1 year old and I sat down to introspect what have I learnt in this one year as “me”, I was amazed. The speed, the clarity, the management, and the constant fight with exhaustion I was winning, I was acing it!!!!

I have no help, like no family or maids to care for my child. Initially it was by choice as I wanted to raise her my way. It was just me & my husband, and this is probably the reason why I realised how this has made me more organized, systematic and passionate about what I want to do with my time!

Apart from this, mothers haven’t heard a good word about themselves in a while. So I thought of breaking the ice and sharing 5 reasons why a new or old mother is a great hire for your team and how her motherhood has improved her productivity manifolds,

  1. Multi tasking – don’t even get me started on this one!!! I used to call myself a MultiTasker earlier but I really didn’t understand the real meaning of these words until I became a mother this becomes your first and most dependable life skill. while multitasking you should be able to do two things at the same time but prioritize in your head which is more important and to which you need to give your more attention. if it’s a mundane task, you practice well just so your multitasking doesn’t cause any hazardous damages!! Like typing while feeding or while changing the diaper making that customer service call and the list goes on. Multitasking isn’t just about doing two things at the same time it’s about prioritising which two things can you do together and which cannot come into this list at all.
  2. Planning – being a mum with no help around, except your spouse and your baby is an easy task only if you are able to plan things well! thankfully that was always a trait I had but I took it to the next level by literally planning whatever was within my control, days, hours or minutes in advance to the real action because planning saves lot of your time and your able to save time, money & energy.
  3. Crisis management – that’s the second name of motherhood because you have a crisis going on every hour! of course the scale is different but it’s also becomes a part of your brain to process faster when there is a situation and also helps you pre-empt any forthcoming situations that can be within your attentive radius.
  4. Creativity – after all a mother has only two hands and two legs but since there is so much to manage, you tend to become creative and find new ways the working things out to save a time and most importantly to save energy this skill comes in super handy at workplaces and you already know that.
  5. Compassion – I don’t think we mothers don’t give ourselves enough credit for what we go through during pregnancy and the effort it takes to push a human out alive out of our body and then raise him/her. This journey makes us understand value of life in general, loving a child makes us warm and compassionate. It makes us better at people management. Of course there are exceptions but I’d want to leave it at hormonal crisis or something. But I feel in today’s world you need skilled people along with compassion and respect for each other in general.

I’ve seen leadership sending their employees on multiple courses and workshops to learn the above mentioned skills and abilities, Which makes them better professionals and even better leaders. But nothing works like real life experience and training.

However, being a mother you get to learn this stuff hands on!! It can be hard but it’s about steering these learning into whatever you do as a professional.
A note –

For mothers- Get up, dust the damn formula off your butt and get going, you are now only a better version of yourself. Don’t waste your time analysing if you will fit in because you don’t have to. Whatever time you have taken a break for make sure you are able to apply those learnings into your working life. If you are passionate about what you do, motherhood will only make you better at it. Fight the stigma, fight the guilt and remember your child does not need a perfect mother, he needs a happy mother!

For organisations- I see some amazing recruitment campaigns encouraging women to get back to work after their journey as a mothers. It’s a great move but we also need to bring about a shift in the mindset within the organisation which includes leaders, your peers and managers who do not look at mothers being a liability. Don’t let “having a baby” become a deciding factor.

For everyone else – Be supportive to woman who wants to work after a baby, boost their confidence, give ideas, create opportunities, and provide solutions.

Share this someone today!!